I logged onto this page the other day for the first time in a long time. Enough time to be surprised my previous journal entry. An entry that I wrote more than a year and two jobs ago. I read it with a longing for the ice that I don't think I will ever quite be able to quell. It is a strange thing to have that burning, almost painful desire to go where you know you do not belong, but it is there never the less.

Much has happened since I last wrote, but not enough to occupy my thoughts at this moment, and as such you will read about little to none of it. All I can say today is that I write from a wobbly table in a little bagel shop in Jackson Wyoming. It's warm and friendly in here, where the presidents, CFOs, and Boardmembers of Goldman Sachs, citi group and the wealthiest institutions in the world wait in line behind bearded and and dreadlocked ski bums who have forsaken their entire savings to spend one winter at the base of the tetons. As a biologist I feel that I fit somewhere in the imaginary middle, and as there is no real middle I a feel that I do not quite belong. Jackson thrives on the stark dicotamy between classes and lifestyles. I work far too much to be a part of the vibrant mountain ski community, however my income is completly incomprehensible to the rest of Jackson, who expect yearly christmas bonuses greater than what I ever expect to make in my entire life. It is in this "middle" that I sit, comfortable, but not a part of the hole.

I look toward the mountains in the west for inspiration and freedom, as these are some of the most storied peaks in American Alpine lore and find only subtle disappointment. They are dramatic, grand and ever present, however in their fame they seem to have lost a bit of their majesty. There is not a gully that has not been skied, a line that has not been climbed, these mountains have turned into a natural theme park. Fun, sure, but also overrun by those expecting cheap thrills for little effort.

I want to write more, as I am not done and have not finished my thought but I am off to work again so as unsatisfying as this entry may be, this is where I will leave it. In Limbo, like me.